Guilt

While I was pregnant, mothers of 2 would sometimes give me words of wisdom and advice. There are some comments that I took with a grain of salt and others I could truly see happening. One, would be mommy guilt. Everyone would say, "You're going to feel guilty, and don't worry everyone feels this way after they have their second." You know, everyone is different but this I knew was coming for me. I spent every waking minute with Lily and we would play uninterrupted and she didn't have to share me, until now. Until now, I haven't wanted to be apart from her but until now I haven't had my sweet baby girl Emma.

I am feeling guilt BIG TIME. I feel guilty that I can't play like I used to with Lily. I feel guilty that I am not giving Emma the attention I gave Lily when she was born. I feel guilty that sometimes they have to wait a little longer and sometimes cry because I'm busy changing a diaper, making a bottle or getting breakfast ready. I feel guilty that they can't have me all to themselves. But, when they can't have me, they have each other. My friend Melissa told me what someone told her, "You've given the best gift of all, the gift of a sibling."

So, I am doing the best that I can, everyday. I love the time the three of us have together and I cherish the moments I have with them alone. There is no doubt that being a mom to two is the hardest job I've ever had and I wouldn't have it any other way. I am in Love with my life and my family.